Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
