Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Randomize
