Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
