I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
Randomize
