dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
You need to stop texting me at SEVEN in the morning. It wakes my one night stands up and makes for the awkward talk way too early.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
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