Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
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