Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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