We need to rekindle our bromance
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
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