I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
Randomize
