I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
We need to rekindle our bromance
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
NoShamevember. You game?
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize
