You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
My ATM looks so different sober.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
