And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
birth control should be required to get into college
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
Randomize