Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
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