New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
I love having hate sex.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
Randomize
