I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize
