he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize