I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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