trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
