3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
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