why didn't you poke me back
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
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