I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
im about as happy as oj after his trial
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize
