No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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