I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Randomize
