When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize
