i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
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