Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
My vagina just clenched in fear
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
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