if you like me you must not know who I am
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Randomize
