Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
