There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
