Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Randomize
