Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Randomize
