you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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