I heard we made out
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize