Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Randomize
