This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
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