apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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