highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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