Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
Randomize
