getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
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