Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
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