Sponge bath it is.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Randomize
