actually, I'm a sock model
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
Even the bartender felt bad for me
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
