Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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