I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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