This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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