oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Randomize
