if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Randomize
