I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
Randomize
