I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Im part way to drunk.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
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