what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
I'm like, not good at living.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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